At the moment I’m really at a funny point of my experience, because I can totally tell that it worked because there’s some areas in my life where I just don’t believe the negative beliefs anymore. But on the other hand I was in such an upward spiral, those days what I was talking about, I mean how long is it ago? 10 years ago ? And I didn’t do any different so how did I manage to really watch my thoughts and contradict them I don’t know so now the challenge is a real hard one for me, because I know how it feels when you’re in the upward spiral and I can totally tell that I’m on the brink of it, but I’m not there yet.

To kickstart this process, I’m setting up a simple alarm as a reminder, about six times a day. Over the next week, I’ll document my experience and share insights in a brief article or post about how this approach is working for me.

In 2024, I’m setting a challenge for myself: to kickstart the upward spiral every day. I plan to employ techniques previously mentioned on this site and seek additional strategies to achieve this. The concept of an upward spiral is familiar to me; I’ve experienced it multiple times. For instance, almost nine years ago, I went through a phase of intense euphoria. While I occasionally re-enter this mode, sustaining it has been challenging. Despite a fulfilling life, complete with health, strong friendships, meaningful relationships, a passion for my hobbies, and the freedom to pursue work that interests me all the time, the reason for my inability to maintain this state eludes me.

Therefore, I’m not only challenging myself but also extending this challenge to you, especially if you’ve experienced or been close to an upward spiral. This challenge is particularly relevant for those who have already discovered their purpose, yet wonder why it hasn’t been the springboard to constant joy and passion they expected. Through this journey, I hope to either consistently inhabit the ‘Appreciation Mode‘ I detailed in another chapter or at least identify additional factors holding me back. Stay tuned, and let me know if you’re on board.

All the years I did not see the connection, but now it is obvious: a daily meditation routine is essential for me. If you want to control your thoughts, you need to be there! Fully aware.

Awareness is the key and is essential to use the stragegies in a specific amount to elicit A-mode.

It is very easy. You add positive thoughts every time you detect a negative thought. I called that the “Carrots vs. Donuts- Strategy” It is highly trainable and very easy if used frequently. There were years in my life, I did that easily, almost without effort. I guess, if you are not facing life events, you get into that upward-spiral much easier, than if you have many interuptions in your life, that are severe and essential for your self-worth.

So what makes the mind wander and not stick to the strategy? What happend when I felt uncapable to use it stubbornly and consequently? Why did I not go through with it all the time.

Awareness gets sucked up by anger and fear

If you are in a stage where you are angry about something or fearing something thoughts go south. Especially if you are in extreme fear you can not focus anymore. It is like a fast current that takes you somewhere you don´ t want to be. Even if you are a skilled meditation practitioner it might be very hard to get out of that stream of thought.

Now I figured out, that if I mediate every day again, the waters of thoughts get quiet and very clear structured. I might only talk for myself, but it seems that mediation only three times a week is not enough to get into A-mode.

Get into A- Mode and then…

Once you are in A-mode, there´ s no need to put in effort in any way anymore. Appreciation-mode is a constant state of gratefulness and appreciation and therefore feels like a constant mindfulness mediation of loving kindness.

Create your world

These days you hear it at lot: some people say you can actually create your world. Although it is still perceived as esotericism by some it is not like that at all. Our reality is not what we always believed it is. The truth is, we got much more influence on what is happening than we were taught.

When you wish for something, you will get it. It is amazing and it works like that. It´s a bit like the bible says: ask and it is given. It is so easy. So what is keeping us back?

The mechanism

“No” you might reply now. “I wanted so many things I didn´t get. That is not true!” But that is just because you did not know how.

You need that positive feeling of appreciation and trust when you think about it and then you get it. Always! The neurological expression is the heart coherence (I already mentioned it in the post Straight flush for positive thinking). Whenever you feel appreciation, joy, love you´ll have a certain pattern of brainwaves and that is all you need to know.

With meditation and exercises you can also get into that state and it seems to have too much impact for us to really get it straight away. Dr. Joe Dispenza who is using that is even said to cure cancer and Parkinson. You can create your body even more than we thought.

Creating the physical world

If you believe that, you still might think: “Ok, influencing your own body might work, that is still kind of logical, but influencing matter? Really? Isn´t that far fetched?”

I´d say: not at all. The latest fiindings in physics are so thrilling that it is crysal clear for me. Of course it is still just a handful of scientist prefering the following explanations. But it is the only available answer for me until today that integrates quantum theory. Check on Tom Campbell and his MBT (My big toe) theory for that.

I am giving you a very intuitive summary here, just that you can check for yourself. I´ll name the essence and implications only, because not everybody is into physics so much that I could go deeper.

Former natural sciences

What we´ve learned in school about natural sciences is based on the following assumptions: Time is linear, so there´s causality. Consciousness derived from matter. So there was this evolution and then the human being derived from other beings and at a certain time we developped some kind of consciousness.

Everybody was talking about it but nobody took it too seriously: Physicists found out that time is not really linear. And also quantum mechanics finds that the result is different whether somebody is looking at it or not. To be honest: If you don´t ever doubt the assumptions in the former paragraph you haven´t payed attention! This is not working if we thought everything was just matter and stable. It is not working! Now physicists even go “oh” and “ah” and “how amazing”. But it is not really amazing. It just seems like magic because our model of the world doesn´t fit!

A model that might fit

Tom Campell (MBT) and others figured out something that is surely to mention. If you´d chose the assumption that life could be a virtual reality you can explain all the findings in quantum mechanics. Still people are denying that. C´mon folks, it doesn´t mean it is a virtual reality, it means that findings are explained best by this model. We might never be truly capable of understanding what reality or existence truly is. But I think that is the closest you can get today.

You create your world

Taking that into account, it is possible that your thinking and your expectations have far more impact than we ever thought. Tom Campbell says, we are just interpreting data streams into reality, so the more ambiguity there is the more impact we have.

Just try it

You might still not be concinved, but the truth is: the old model is not bearable anymore. Consciousness is very likey to have a big impact. So why not giving it a try? Get yourself into really positive mood, meditate, appreciate, love, celebrate and then visualize goals and wishes and see what happens. Don´t believe anybody who is saying this is not scientific. Any science is still lacking to explain quantum effects. It is eqally non-scientific to deny that kind of impact.

Unchanged effort

Today I realized that focusing on good things will always be the same. You can only do it now, but you have to, if you want to suceed. It is allways the same thing: it remains unchanged effort.

Of course there are situations full of chaos or pain, where the main focus is to change the situation. That will always be there: life throwing things at you, you have to deal with. But that doesn´t happen very often. Most of the times no serious, life-threatening situations occur. Most of the times there is no big thing going on, but you in your daily life or you in your free-time pussyfooting around. That is the time I want to talk about. Because it is the time that determines everything. Whether you thrive or you stagnate, whether you enjoy or complain, whether you celebrate or you whine. It is very important what you think in those times.

Recently I wondered, why I can´t do it sometimes. I must say, I have been sloppy in my meditation practise. There were times I practised at least 5 times a week, now I am down to 5 times a month I guess. I also did somthing like writing down what I have and what I want. That always turns out really postive. Once you started that and you get into detail you get into a really good mood place. But I did that lesser and lesser. I ended up in a place where everything was fine, but me, because I didn´t realize what is positive in its fullness. I ended up in a rather mediocre mood-state.

Decide focusing on the good things

I decided to focus on the good things again. Although I have been very far on that path, I have to put effort in it. I had times where it worked so automatically that I stopped maintaining my habits. And it is true: once you are in A-mode you don´t need mediation or exercises for being positive. You are appreciation in person. But when life throws stuff at you, you have to react to, you will need a certain time to come back to the neutral place. And then make it your main aim to get that positivity focus again!

I now had my divorce done and everything is fine. I even bought the house of my ex-husband. That makes me really happy. There are so many reasons to be happy now. Just the fact that I, a woman, that has seperated and lives with her three kids, gets the money from the bank and can live a free and self-determined life! That is so great. Think of all the former generations of women, deceived and bleeded by a male society, having nothing and having to little time to work because of raising children! I feel so privileged and I know I am, living that free life I always wanted. I can do whatever I want in my house.

Positive thinking needs effort

But I was in a neutral stage. What happens is, that you catch yourself thinking: “I have so much to clean, it is such a big house” or “so much work to do”. But I do know how it works! I know I can also focus on the good so thoroughly, not noticing the negative aspects at all. I´ve been there. (Just practise the strategies I mentioned on the How it works-page). It can all be so easy and action results from inspiration only. But it is a matter of the mind. Of YOU focusing on the good. First step: realize that it is about focusing. Step two: Do anything and I mean anything on a regular basis, what fosters your positive state. For me that means: getting back into meditation practics again and very important: write down everyday what is good in your life. Go wild: name anything, starting by how your skin or your eyes work, to what is in your fridge, to what you already achieved in your life.

This will always be unchanged effort: no matter where you are in the future, whether you own a bussiness, or whether you turn very rich, if you are a grandma, or if you live in a new city. You can always focus on the good things and it will never be harder than right now. It will be rather less effort if you get used to it, but never more.

Foster your dreams

Your dreams have a very special function. We tend to forget that. I want to show you when you should remember.

there is one question people always get irritated about. Sometimes you get the advice: It is important to do whatever you want to do and not listen to what others say. Many people who are quite successful tell others: Just ignore others´critics and do your thing!

On the other hand, many say: You´ve got to be open to feedback. It seems to be very selfish and ignorant just not listening to others. We are social beings and we want to fit in somewehere, we want to be loved and liked and we want others to feel good, too. We also want to be heard. How could we deny other poeple´s opinions? People who get really happy always say: It is not about me only. If the people around me get really and truly happy, I am happy too. Just me being happy is too little of a goal. I want my beloved ones to proceed and to be valued.

So how do these concept fit together? Is there an answer how both things can work at the same time? I reckon many could write a book about that, but I am simplifying it for you. Today I just want you to do a very helpful thing, that will really make you thrive:

Concentrate on your dreams

People who thrive have a very special way in dealing with their dreams. I don´t only mean monetary thriving. Literally any time a person is perceiving a certain success, either inventing something, or getting better at something or having fun with a hobby or a profession, dreaming plays a huge role. Because before something can become a goal, we tend to dream a version of it. People are forgetting about that! Everybody knows, that you need goals to start an action and reach your goals. Many forget that there´s a lot happening before. Professional athletes, actors, entrepreneurs and musicians keep on talking about that in interviews. In all cases, they dreamt about getting better in that area before.

It is about YOUR dreams

You might think, that has got nothing to do with you? Just think about a cake you might bake. What makes you want to bake that cake? Who put the goal into your mind? Think about it. You have a very good impression about the smell, the taste, the happiness of the people eating that delicious cake. That is a dream! It is a dream situation/picture you are holding in your mind. It is very vivid, because you had experiences with eating cake before. But it is still only existing in your mind. That´s what dreams are.

Now the major point: The better you can hold that dream, the more motivation you got, the more persistent you are and the better will be the result. This is very easy to understand now: because you had cakes before, the easier you can keep the picture in your mind and if you had success with that before, the more expectant you will be of a positive outcome. When the goal is a bit further away, means you haven´t done it before, the more fantasy you need. But it changes nothing: the more vivid your dream is, the better you can imagine the outcome, the better your motivation is.

Your dreams are like kids – foster them

Don´t let anyone critisize your dreams. If your belly tells you, you really want something, don´t let anyone destroy the picture you are attempting to build at the moment. If necessary, don´t tell anybody. Keep that a secret. You want to be an entrepreneur but you are a pupil now? You are a single- mother and want to be a well known artist. Never let anybody critisize your dreams. If people are trying to kill your dreams, by saying: you will never get there! or You can´t do it. Just don´t listen! If you want to be a decent social person, let the feedback in, but never let them critisize your dreams. 

Your dream might be like a small and weak kid. People might say: This one is never gonna be a sportsman! Don´t listen to them! You foster your dreams and they will grow up and prosper. They might turn out to be different, than you expected, but they will grow when you foster them and they will give you awesome results.

Doubting the doubt

I am getting back into A-mode quite frequently now. But the problem I was struggeling with, seems to be different than I thought.

I assumed, that it is the percentage of negative thought, (the trevor-index) that makes you slip into A-mode, when kept very, very small. The last weeks I caught myself by thinking negative or sceptical thoughts and was angry about myself. There were times where it worked so easily, now it feels like more work or effort, to always remind myself.

[su_box title=”A-MODE” style=”soft” radius=”10″]Appreciation-mode: the state you get in when you predominantly think positive thought. A joyful and happy state full of positive expectation and acceptance.[/su_box]

Today I had a different notion: what if, I always had bad thoughts, too, but didn´t pay enough attention? It seems to me, like there were always aspects in my life that were negative and I realized them and thought about them. What is different now? Maybe I am getting even more aware every single day. It seems to me as if I am aware of my thoughts all the time. Yesterday I drove to friends and during that ride I had some negative rumination going on about money and how my ex-husband wants to solve things. I noticed that I thought about it and told myself: stop it now. Think something different. But then he called me again and wanted to discuss the topic and I was annoyed. After hanging up I went on thinking about it. Realizing I thought about it, I stopped the thought again just to catch myself later thinking about it again.

But it was only half an hour or so and I distracted myself by singing in the car. I really believe that I had bad thoughts, too in autumn last year, but I didn´t have the focus on it. It happened, but I neither worried nor thought too much about it. But A-mode really is helping a lot. Because once you are having the ease and the light feeling of appreciation, it is so easy to ignore negative thoughts. When you are in A-mode  a whole set of positive expectations and positive beliefs is activated in the background. I remember myself having had severe problems with my ex in the past, and thinking: “I know everything will work out for me. I know I am fine and I can think postive, no matter what. I am so happy to be so positive for I know the bad things will go away and good things are always coming to me”. That times I really thought: if I am truly positive, either my husband would change his mind, so our problems would vanish or we would split, but never did I have a negative expectation about that. I truly believe, that I can have awesome, nice and appreciating relationships with people around me. I can have fun and joy moments all the time. Especially now I am spending a lot of time with very nice people, establish friendships, mutual acceptance for who we really are. I am so happy about that.

Getting back into a-mode

The last weeks I have been slightly irritated by the fact, that I have been in a-mode for very, very long time spans in the last years, but now- during the last month after seperating from my husband- it was much less. I thought I was a pro. I thought nothing could disturb me for more than some hours. Even in October where I injured my knee and was hardly able to walk I felt good and got into positive thinking very easy. I spent quite a bit of time analysing what is going on. I figured out that there is actually some worrying going on in the background. It was all about money and wondering if I can pay bills. There was a lot of thinking on how I would say things to my ex, how I could make myself clear and on how I could solve the situation. That thinking seemed quite neutral to me: though there was a bit of worrying about money, I still had the expectation of my money getting more and the feeling that there are solutions. But it was a bit exhausting, always playing situations through. Then yesterday, when I was running, a sudden realization struck me: It was not about the thinking iteself, it was all about beliefs in the background. Because of some arguments with my ex-partner I held the belief, that it might be hard with him. That he will be stubborn and refuse to compromise. The next idea that came to me was, that I might hold the belief that I have to fight to get what I deserve. These two beliefs are the core of my rumination! I instantly started to weaken these beliefs. That is what my strategies are about: weakening and changing beliefs. (Check the how-it-works section for instructions.) The first notion that came to my mind was: it will always be enough. I don´t need to worry. There is a lot of prosperity in my life and it has been increasing ever since. I don´t need to worry about money. I have everything I need and have always been able to pay bills. And also the other beliefs wasn´t too hard to alter: my husband has been a decent person all the time. He might not argue anymore. He wants his kids to be happy- he might not make any trouble and he might soon be able to communicate properly. With the altered beliefs my whole mindset changed very fast. It changed in just one factor: I stopped thinking about it. It just ended. I caught myself in thinking about food and what to cook in the evening. Seems to me like all of our rumination  has beliefs in the background that want to be changed!! DO IT!!

A-mode

I want to invent another term: Appreciation-mode, or A-mode. Once you trained your thinking into positive, you strengthened you positive connections in your network, there is something like assuredness or stability that is hard to explain. It feels like trust and farsightedness. When it occured to me the first times, it felt like being in a harbour (in the sea) and there are walls. So when you are in the water you can´t see the land. But when your positivity is there, it lifts you like a wave and suddenly you can see the land and you can see very far. When positivity gets more and more frequently, you enhance the times where you can actually see. That was a period of about several month where I could “see” how things are, more and more often. Then you get to the stage where your water level is high enough to see the land all the time: In that state the main emotion you got is appreciation. Wherever you look at you´ll always find something to appreciate. It is a great feeling. I call this A-mode – the appreciation-mode .

I think there is quite a big difference between “normal” thinking and a-mode thinking. A-mode thinking is hardly any effort. It feels very intuitive and is full of trust and positive expectation. In a-mode I always react with refusal when somebody displays a negative expectation. I always think “Nah. I don´t think that is true”, just because of my belly-feeling. In a-mode there is no rumination at all, most of the times it feels as if I am not thinking at all. Thoughts that come up are mainly appreciation. It is rather like relaxation of the mind combined with intuitive reactions resulting right from the calmness you feel inside. That kind of thinking is very fruitful, for what comes to you mind intuitively is ALWAYS right. I can´t really prove that. Maybe others did already, but intuitive thinking is so full of trust and the feeling of rightness, that you don´t get any feelings of doubt or lack of motivation. Something that comes right out of intuition feels so good that you definitely WANT to do it. It is awesome.

Getting back in

As I told you: there´s that tipping point, where you get more and more positive and it´s all about the trevor-index. However, the last month I have been out of that mode. Sometimes for hours, sometimes for up to two days I´d say. I broke up with my husband, and some things have been frightening and some have been very negative, so I wasn´t able to stay entirely positive. Now I appreciate the situation. Because, it would be not such a great deal to stay positive if only good things happened to you. I can only get a real master if I get off track, because then I find ways to get back in. The problem about problems is, they are very captivating. Somebody might call you and plant a very negative information right into your mind and you can´t prevent thinking about it. On that point it depends on how your Positive-Negative Ratio has been that day and days before I´d say. Because at the beginning I could switch from getting insulted to another topic and thus regain good mood very fast. But the occurence of negative events was not controllable at all and happened many, many times. There were certain days where it felt like my ease just slipped through my fingers. But I was very aware and got back into positive mode again. Then there was fear, and fear is really the least controllable component, because it makes you circle around a topic in mind which is not good for you. My stability wasn´t there anymore, but my positive expectancy was.

I was thinking: “It is alright. I am going through a big change and I don´t need to be stable all the time. I will learn many, many things about myself”. Sometimes you are brooding about things and you can´t stop straight away.  Looking at a problem is like looking at a fractal video (check the nice fractal video below). It´s always the same, but you get deeper and deeper and you can´t focus on anything else. It gets just more and more and more, the deeper you get into it. It is important to find strategies to distract yourself and guide your focus on something else.

I made a plan for myself that I switch out of ruminating at certain times per day. It is very important to end negative processing. And in many cases it is not only possible but it is also a skill you can enlarge and train.

[su_youtube_advanced url=”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bo-MB1QPZ7E” width=”200″ height=”200″]